Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Status update

Christmas gifts: NB gifts: still not sent; SB's: still not purchased. This is a problem. Hopefully we can send off the New Brunswick gifts tomorrow. And hopefully they will arrive on time. Hopefully SB will quit telling me he wants a new rug and a new vacuum cleaner for Xmas and pick something fun.

Work: glad I put that "leave us alone, we're booked solid" message on the voicemail. Much less stressful this week in the whole message-taking department. Snow = making my work day hell. Also, am pretending Xmas is still four weeks away so I do not throw myself into cardiac arrest thinking about all the crap I'll be scooping next week (that is literal).

Snowstorm: big fat pain in the ass as usual. Our street hasn't even had the sidewalks cleared yet. Some of the main roads had one side done last night and will have the other done tonight. Oh, and here's a fun story. Today while traveling down a one-way street I got stopped up behind a line of like four cars. I could see that in front of them there was a BMW sedan trying to get out of a parking spot, but it's pretty icy out there, so he just kept spinning his wheels. Big shock, none of the asshole guys in front of me were getting out to help. Cars lined up behind us and started honking. There were probably about 20 cars back there when I got out and helped the guy push his car out. It took about 7.7 seconds. I gave the men in the cars in front of me dirty looks as I passed them on the way back to my truck. Come on people. Just come on.

I have been talking a lot about the snow lately (believe me, I would be very happy if it would just go away so I could stop talking about it) and I realize that people outside of our fair city probably have no idea what kind of hell I'm talking about. Here is a description.

a) snow falls

b) snowplows go around pushing snow off the roadway, but up against all the parked cars. This makes a nice little den for your car. Perfect for hybernation. Not perfect for getting to work.

c) snow fall ends

d) you have to work, so you dig out around you car (about 1 foot on three sides, and under the tires) and ram your way out of the snow bank.

e) the city puts up "no parking" signs on the side of the street where they will be plowing. They either prohibit parking all day or all night.

f) theoretically, if you work at a normal job, you drive home and have to fight with the snowbank to park your car. Usually I like the ram and slide method, wherein I ram either the front or back end into the space, hope to catch the tracks of the person who left, and hopefully slide into the spot. I do not work a normal job, so I generally fight with about 6-10 snowbanks per day with all my picking up and dropping off of doggies. I am a very good shoveller now. Very efficient.

g) the city passes for snow removal. This is actual physical removal of the snow. First a special sidewalk plow passes and pushes all the snow onto the street (where no cars are parked because of the helpful orange signs). Then a big giant snowblower passes, accompanied by a big giant dump truck. The snowblower blows the snow into the dump truck, and then the dump truck takes the snow away (they usually dump it in the St. Lawrence, I think).

f) everyone starts getting into fist-fights for parking spots on the good side of the street.

g) repeat the next day.

So, it takes at least two days to clear a street, and when you live on a small street like we do, you have no idea how long it will take them to actually get to your street. It's all very efficient, as you can see. (sarcasm intended).

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