Friday, November 30, 2007

A happy ending

We have reached the end of the line folks. Here sitteth my final post of NaBloPoMo. I do not have it in me to write anything meaningful, no summation of this month and the exercise of taking time each and every day to devote to a task other than work. I barely have enough vocabulary to ...

Ya I just totally lost my train of thought there. I got nothing.

One of my girls and I were totally heroes today. A guy we see regularly walking in the forest lost his dog. She saw him when she was finishing up her first group and he told her that little Herman was lost. So when I finished my groceries I went to the mountain and made my own trip up, looking for Herman on the way, and when I saw his owner I took all his info just in case one of us found him.

I left the mountain as my girl was on her way there. About an hour later she called me: she found Herman! When I called his owner, he was SO happy - but there was a problem. He had driven around the back of the mountain up to the top in case Herman had slipped through a fence and was running around in the cemetary up there. And when he drove down the driveway, he got his truck stuck in the snow. So I gave him my number, and he said he would call when he got the truck out.

About 20 minutes later, he called to say he couldn't get the truck out, even with the help of a passerby, so he had called CAA and they would be there in 30 minutes.

Then 1 1/2 hours later, he called to say he just got the truck out because when CAA came their truck got stuck.

I totally didn't mind. Because the whole time Herman was here at my place and we were just chillin'.

I felt really happy when Herman's dad arrived to pick him up - it was pretty awesome to see Herman's reaction to being reunited, although I think he was kinda sad that it was time to leave before he got to take a bite out of Simon's ass.

I also felt very happy that Herman's dad's horrible day from hell was over (hopefully). I know how it feels to have such a rotten day, and I'm glad that we were able to help in the end. I hope this goes in the karma bank. It'll help negate all the attitude I give homeless people, hopefully.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Who's the one person more annoying than Spencer?

His sister, apparently. The Hills last night:

1. Who the hell is this girl? Where has she been all this time? When is she going to go back there? Heidi's face was precious while Spencer and his sister were making the whole big thing about her encounter with Lauren and Brody. I get the feeling that she just barely tolerates Spencer's behavior because maybe he's good in bed and also it gets her more press being part of the "most hated couple", but now that his sister is around, Heidi's had enough.

2. How cute was Brody defending Lauren to Spencer's sister? I'm sure he has known that bitch all his life, but he's still like "mind your own beeswax". ~swoon~

3. We have finally witnessed the dismissal of Justin Bobby. I hate that we didn't get to actually witness his transgression, but I did find it amusing that even though Audrina witnessed it, he still tried to deny it happened. And when she was like "I saw you kiss that girl" he was like "well, you must be mistaken, because I didn't" and then Audrina noted that "all my friends saw you too" he says "well of course they're going to say that - they hate me." Hey, dude, it's not like Lauren and Brody were out one night and decided to tell Audrina they saw you out messing with some chick at a bar. She saw you with her own eyes.

I am pretty excited for next week's episode since Spencer and Heidi get into another row, although it's getting a bit tedious because I don't think she will be physically able to spontaneously grow a brain and leave him, but it's still entertaining.

Also have to say that I am officially addicted to Tila Tequila's show, and last night there was an all out psycho girl catfight! It was to-be-continued to see what will become of the two bitches that had it out, but holy eff it was awesome!

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Occupational hazard

One of the hardest parts about my job is having to restrain myself from abducting my clients. Some of them are just so fucking cute I can't even believe they exist. I want to carry them around in a snuggly all day long. I mean, how can you go through a whole 40 minute walk in the woods without scooping this one up and squeezing him til he yelps:

And I am currently taking care of this kitten, and periodically catch myself removing his head from my mouth because I'm trying to eat him up.

He has the cutest little muffin face I've ever seen! There are two other cats at his house, both of whom are indifferent to me, and I find it difficult to force myself to spend time with them trying to pet them as they yawn at me, or play toy with them as they bat half-heartedly like "eh, I don't need you lady. Why don't you get out of here so I can do the real fun stuff that we can only get into when you stinky humans aren't around." And this little guy doesn't make it any easier. Because I can either tend to those guys, or sit around cuddling this:

Ugh, my job is so tough.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Eau de Puss

It is not even December and we are already booked as heavy for the holidays as we were last year. And I am workin' it. I'm fielding calls and answering emails and running around from one end of the city to the other meeting people. It all feels very rat-racy, which is the opposite of the reason I started doing this work in the first place. But I'm willing to cram it all in right now as long as we see some results in January. AKA moolah.

I wish that blogger had a "smell" this application. Because it would be absolutely impossible for me to describe to you how wonderful my cat smells. He likes to cuddle up next to me and and pull my hand towards him forcing me to scratch his ears. Then he rolls over and exposes his belly for some rubs because that's also a fun thing for a human, so he guesses he will allow me. And when it is obvious that I am not going to get any work done at all until he gets his due affections, I bury my nose in his neck. He always smells soooooo good. I have even had people smell him. They'll be like "Simon is the cutest cat ever" and I'm like "That's nothing, you should smell him" and then I pick him up and bring him over so they can.

I wish I could share this with you. It is one of the small joys of my day.

Monday, November 26, 2007

Squeegie, step off

My job involves a lot of driving from client to client, and I see my fair share of panhandlers. Here are a few tips, in case you happen to be a panhandler at home tonight surfing the internetz, and would like me to drop you a quarter or something tomorrow.

1. Having a skill is useful. Play an instrument. Sing. Juggle. Standing there shaking a cup in my face does not make me want to give you money. My favorite two panhandlers are the guy who plays the spoons on Ste. Catherine street, and Loud Singing Guy. Loud Singing Guy sings around one of the university downtown - he wears an old suit and tie and tapes his music to the wall. He sings standards. Very loudly. And pourly. But with heart, and I love that.

2. Stay out of the traffic. My least favorite panhandlers are the squeegie kids and others who accost me while I'm in my car. This is my space. Step off. I politely decline with a wave and a smile, and usually these guys move on to the next car since the red light is only so long and why waste time with someone who isn't gonna give you anything? The worst part is that whenever I have allowed a squeegie to squeegie me (back in my more youthful and less cynical days) this stench of cigarettes and BO always got sucked in through the vents.

3. Do not use helpless dogs to try and get my sympathy. I just feel bad for the dogs who are stuck with you as an owner. PS: I am a dog walker and usually have treats in my pocket, so if you try to use a dog to get something out of me, chances are all you're gonna get is a snack for your pup.

4. Do not get a homeless person's advocate group to advertise that you make an average of $10 per hour panhandling to people in cars on Notre Dame Blvd. That is more than minimum wage. That does not make me want to help you out.

Thinking back, I'm pretty sure I have blogged about this subject before at some point. I just feel so bad for the people who are out there because they have to be, or don't know what else to do. Because I'm sure I'm not the only person who has become jaded by the guy down the street begging for a quarter for a sandwich who still reeks of whiskey.

Sunday, November 25, 2007

goo brain

With five days left in NaBloPoMo, I feel like I am at the point where I am just a babbling idiot. I don't have anything that interesting to say. I can't form a proper thought. And I'm thinking about work pretty much 24/7, and I know that's boring. So, sorry about that.

Tomorrow I am starting a week of catsits with the cutest little cat family ever. A blue point Himalayan, a tabby exotic, and a baby flame point Himalayan. They are adorable. I will try to resist bringing home the baby in my pocket.

I'm nearly crapping my pants that December is only five days away. That means the holidays are too close. We have bought most of our gifts, so I will have to start wrapping them up so they can be sent off in time. I am trying to keep our holiday bookings as organized as possible so I can have a good idea of exactly how much work I'm going to have on Christmas Day and New Year's Day. Right now we're about halfway to the mark we hit last year, but most of the clients who have booked now are new - our regulars tend to be lazy and book closer to the date. We have grown a lot this year, and I expect to have more bookings, but I'm trying to stay focused and smart. It's important to me that we grow and use this opportunity to make some moolah, but I don't want to feel like shooting myself in the face on Dec 25th at 2pm because there seems to be no end in sight to the litter boxes.

PS - if anyone feels like spending the day at my house cooking us a nice turkey dinner on Xmas day, please feel free to volunteer. Last year we had club sandwiches. They were good. But not Xmas good.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Hot Tubin'

Miracle of miracles we have had a very busy day and are having people over in about an hour, but here I am, still remembering to blog. Thank you NaBloMoFo - I am now an automated robot - blogging has become a part of my circadian rhythm.

But, I am kind of phoning it in slightly. I have nothing that interesting to say, so I thought I would link to a few of my favorite music youtubes.

I recently saw Arcade Fire on PBS and realized that I actually like them a whole lot. I had heard one of their songs on the local pop station wedged between Britney and an overplayed Nelly tune, and liked it, but never really looked into the band to see what the rest of their stuff is like. Then when I saw the PBS show by accident one Saturday night, I was pretty blown away not only by their sound, but the whole concept of a pseudo-orchestral band. So, here is a clip of probably my favorite song I've heard them play.

I first heard about Wolf Parade while reading Dooce, and instantly fell in love with them. I warbled along with them in my car for about a year before I got a chance to see them play and discovered I went to school with one of the guys briefly. Wolf Parade was also founded when Arcade Fire asked the guy if he had a band who could open for them and he said ya - even though he didn't have a band, or any songs, or anything. But they got together and voila. This song. Which makes me cry 87% of the times I hear it. That link is from a show this summer in Montreal, which was in the same round of shows I saw. Watch this one to see the video for the same song. I also really dig this song, and who knew they got to play on network TV?

So that's what I'm youtubin' lately. It totally blows my mind that all of these dudes are my age and from my community. I am such an underachiever.

Friday, November 23, 2007

Break out the eggnog

American Thanksgiving time has put holiday movie season into full swing.

I'm sure everyone has their favorites. Every year I see the listings for Miracle on 34th street, and It's a Wonderful Life. The Grinch. All those. But those are not my favorites. Nor have they ever been. I've never seen either of the former. And I don't think I ever watched the classic version of the latter either. Here are some of my favorites:

  • Home Alone - I haven't watched it for the last few years, but for a while there it was a staple. Even Home Alone 2 is really great. I love the hijinks with the dummys rigged to ropes so he can move them around. And Joe Pesci - probably my favorite character he's ever played.
  • National Lampoons - The rodent in the Xmas tree. The dried out turkey. The dickey. Enough said.
  • Love Actually - I always love movies where all the stories are intertwined, but this one does it with humor and warm fuzzies instead of horror and irony. Plus, it's a relatively new movie, and since I usually only watch it during the holidays, I barely remember what happens in it.
  • Stepmom - although mildly depressing, it still leaves you feeling pretty good. But in a realistic kind of way. I think this one takes the cake as SB's favorite holiday movie, but don't tell anybody that.
  • The Family Man - No, not the Family Guy, The Family Man. It's kind of like A Christmas Carol, but not. There are cute kids in it. SB and I actually agreed that if maybe you could choose which kids you could have, we would choose the little girl in this movie. But since you can't choose which kids you can have, we will forego all that and get a baby Himalayan kitten. (okay, we didn't agree to get the kitten, but it was another moment for me to sneak in a bit of my cost/benefit analysis of the whole situation).

I was planning on posting this list anyway, but when we sat down to dinner tonight, we discovered that The Family Man was on TV. After celebrating American Thanksgiving yesterday by cooking a whole turkey dinner for just the two of us, I must say, it is putting me in a rather festive mood.

I must also say that my mood would be even more festive if we had a DVR and could have recorded this movie off of network television and watched it tomorrow while fast-forwarding the commercials.....

Thursday, November 22, 2007

A tale of two turkeys

I could never really understand American Thanksgiving. We have Thanksgiving here in the Great White North as well, but we have it in October, with all the pretty leaves changing, and it is on a Monday, so it is like a regular long weekend. We have turkey. We have pumpkin pie. What we appear to be missing is some kind of hype that I'm not sure I really understand.

Why is American Thanksgiving (AT) on a Thursday? Is it so you will be able to justify an extra week off? Because if you are travelling, you probably do so Wednesday, and then you are there til Sunday, but to avoid travel rush you probably leave Monday.

Why is AT in November? November is not a pretty month. For example, here it snowed and freezing rained all day, and I'm sure our dear friends in Vermont who are celebrating today shared this lovely weather. Not so good for travelling. October is a much more reliable month.

Also, still on the whole November thread, why would you have AT so close to Christmas? It just seems that if you are going to have one holiday that pretty much lasts a whole week, and then another holiday that usually lasts a week, you would want to spread them out a little bit. Again, October wins.

Why do people feel like they HAVE to be with their families on AT? It is a phenomenon that baffles me. You don't have to be with your family to be thankful for them. And you are going to see them in less than a month anyway. We Canucks feel free to hunker down to our birds wherever we may find them. I have had my share of Thanksgivings with my family, but since moving 1000km away, I like to celebrate with my friends too. In fact, the celebrations with friends sometimes feel more genuine because they are not forced, not expected.

If you are American, please fill me in if you know the precise answer to any of my questions. And "it's tradition" is not an answer.

Of course, cynical me, I have a sneaking suspicion that it has to be on a Thursday so that retailers can have Black Friday (although we Canadians still seem to get all of our holiday shopping done without it), and it needs to be close to Christmas so that people are really in the buying mood.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

And the giant cubic zirconia goes back on...

I totally love that has all their shows on-demand. This offers me a window onto how wonderful life would be with a DVR. Missed The Hills on Monday, but got to watch today.

1. I totally loved that Whitney was featured in this episode. It was hilarious when Lauren was explaining how to get out of kissing a guy when you have a "no kiss on the first date policy" - Whitney was like "what do you do then?" Lauren: "just turn your head" W: "couldn't that get awkward?" L: "Not if you do it right" W: "if I did it it would turn out awkward". It's so true - she's so goofy and clumsy, but that's what makes me love her! The Jared guy seemed nice enough, but while on the date he seemed like he was still in "trainer" mode - like he was trying to psych her up to get through the date or something.

2. Preview for next week is not looking good for Audrina and Justin Bobby. I wouldn't be sad if that's the last we see of him. And using the name "Justin Bobby" reminds me that we haven't seen Lo for a while - I wonder if she's busy making out with Frankie Delgato somewhere.

3. It was awesome to see Heidi finally give it to Spencer. It was especially effective that she took that giant lame-assed ring and shoved it back in his face. It's bad enough that he is a complete ass-face to everyone else on the planet, but there is no reason that he should treat her like a possession that he can just make do whatever he pleases. I just wonder how long the new, apologetic Spencer will last.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

First Snow

We got our first snowfall overnight last night. Hmmpf. I was so grumpy when I took my dogs out this morning for their walk - boo to wet shoes, boo to drying off their paws, boo to the spot on our stairs that is obviously going to be a trouble spot with an icy patch throughout the winter.

The driving around wasn't so bad, since it was pretty warm today so nothing froze up. I picked up all my group dogs, and we drove to the mountain. Started walk as usual.

Then suddenly the pups came alive. They started hopping through the snow like bunnies, and wrestling playfully with each other instead of independently sniffing all the spots where dogs peed before them. The Irish Terrier ripped a branch right of a tree then ran along merrily, whacking everyone with it as she zoomed past them. The Yellow Lab has to be kept on leash because she has the lovely penchant for eating poo, and the Irish Terrier and the Wheaton Terrier took turns running in between us, hopping over the swag of the leash that hung there. Several times different dogs tried to engage me in wrestling, hopping in front of me and growl/yipping then getting into the "downward dog" play pose, challenging me to get them, get them, get them.

Amidst all the tussling and the fetching and the big kisses when I kneeled down to scratch their ears, I forgot all about how annoying the snow is, how annoying clients are being lately, how busy I am, how much laundry I have to do. I forgot everything. I was just there, hanging out, and having fun.

Monday, November 19, 2007

I am the only person bothered by this?

Is anyone else bothered by this McDonald's commercial? They are introducing a new limited time sandwich called the bacon ranch McChicken or something similar to that. It actually looks very good, and they do their 30 second thing about what is on it, describing all the ingredients using words like "crispy", "tangy", and "fresh".

Then at the end of the commercial, they say something to the effect of "because when you're craving bacon, nothing else will do."

When I'm craving bacon, nothing else will do except a hamburger bun, some ranch dressing, a giant piece of fried chicken, a slice of tomato, maybe a leaf of lettuce (but they will have probably run out, so probably some little ribbons of shredded stuff), and two over-microwaved pieces of bacon.

I don't know, and call me crazy if I'm wrong, but I really think that when I'm craving bacon, nothing else will do except for maybe bacon. And in a pinch maybe turkey bacon.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Fred Thompson and Dick Wolf can kiss my tush.

I love all Law and Order. Regular. SVU. CI. All of them. I have plans to name future furry children after some of the characters. I'm pretty sure I have seen every single episode of each of the series. I am hardcore.

However, I am a bit dismayed over a little development they snuck in to last week's episode of Special Victims Unit.

Because Fred Thompson is running for president in real life, Arthur Branch cannot be on TV in any new episodes. They delayed the return of Law and Order, presumably to see what would happen in the primaries, and maybe Branch would be back. At least this is what I assumed. Then last week, what slips in the conversation between Olivia and Casey? That Casey has a new boss. Jack McCoy.

I am stunned and offended by this development. Jack McCoy is not the boss. He doesn't have to make the hard calls. Jack McCoy is the rebel, the stick-to-his-guns and his unpopular but correct views man. He bucks the norm. He laughs in the face of authority. How can one laugh in one's own face? One can't.

I am interested to see if they will actually stay true to the character and keep him liberal and slick, or if he will turn into a hardass towing the line to keep the voters happy. I truly hope it is the former, because Jack McCoy is anything but The Man. Anything else would be a lie.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Unintentional innuendo

Dinner last night was fabulous and I am so glad that I hauled my ass off the sofa to go. Almost even better was the little shopping extravaganza prior to dinner wherein I spent far too much money on new handbags and sweaters, but that is all under wraps until SB finds the carefully hidden merchandise....

When all the girls get together, there are always stories that make us laugh until things shoot our our noses. One of the stories is a staple, and gets told pretty much every time we get together because there is someone who has missed the last few get togethers and hasn't heard the story.

The staple story is one that N heard from a friend. He was out to dinner with a francophone woman he worked with and some people they would want to impress (I forget if they were bosses or business acquaintances, but you get the picture). At the end of the meal, when the waiter came around to pick up the plates the woman was in the middle of a conversation and flippantly said to the waiter, "oh, yes, I would like to take it doggy style." Now none of us in our circle of friends is able to say "I'd like a doggy bag" - we all say "can I have this to go?" because we are so terrified that it might slip out "I'll take it doggy style."

During the dinner last night, our friend T was the one who had never heard this story. And then it turns out she had a funny story of her own that involved a bit of a language barrier. She went to a dinner party at her fiance's friend's home. The friend's wife is very french, but T and her man are pretty anglo so they spent the evening speaking in english. They had a lovely wine and cheese before dinner, and were all getting along very well - the food was beautiful too. Then as the wife was clearing the cheese plates and things, she said happily, "I hope you saved room - now it's time for the intercourse!" T and her fiance were cracking up laughing and it got explained that it was the "main course" not the "intercourse". It was a good thing that they were right about the mistake and T hadn't ended up at that kind of party.

Friday, November 16, 2007


I have been having a tough time lately. I am in a rut where things seem bleak. I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. Each day is just a day that I am passing for the sake of saying I made it through that day. It's sad, and it's frustrating, and it's probably strange for most people to hear.

I have a great life. I love my job and am so lucky to be passionate about the work I do every day. I love my home and feel fortunate to live in a place I love surrounded by comfort and beautiful things. My family is healthy, my pets are loving and funny, SB is a hardworker and wants to work towards our goals with me.

But I am sad. And down. And lonely. I am lonely, but I feel antisocial. I am going to dinner tonight with friends, but I'm not really looking forward to it. I know I should be, I miss them, but the thought of getting dressed and driving there and being out at night instead of home on the sofa is, frankly, exhausting to me right now. Just the thought of it.

I'm sure everyone gets the blues, and I rationalize that at least I am cognizant of the fact that this is weird, that at least I force myself to socialize and have fun, because I'm sure once I'm there it will be fabulous. But I don't think it's normal that I feel that everything just takes so much effort.

I know all of this probably indicates that maybe I should go back on meds. But I have been telling myself that it will pass, that it's just the change in weather. Then maybe I'm thinking it seems like too much effort to see a doctor. And that would indicate that it is even more important than I thought.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Random because I'm running out of things to talk about

I am so sick of "Music is my Boyfriend" from the iPod Touch commercials. I think I am mostly sick of it because I love it so much and feel the need to dance every time it comes on, and I am also annoyed that I always think it's Avril Lavigne but it is really not. I thought it was Skye Sweetnam because I just googled "Music is my Boyfriend" and apparently she has a song by that name, but then I YouTubed that and it is totally not the same song. The name of the song is really "Music is my Hot, Hot Sex" and is by a Brazilian group called Cansei de Ser Sexy.

I am sad that we have had tacos every Thursday for about a month and tonight we will not have tacos because SB has a work dinner. My body has already accepted that Thursday is Taco Night. Now it's too late to turn back - ever.

Oprah is talking to a hoarder today. I think I have hoarding tendencies, so I am making a conscious decision to check myself before I wreck myself.

I have been running three times per week for almost two month with zero results. I am getting very frustrated, and I wish I could afford to go back to yoga.

I need a haircut, but I'm too lazy to go get one. Plus I can think of about 100 other things I would rather spend money on.

When our dog Charlie is sleeping, he looks like a bean. I would almost want to lay down and cuddle with him if I didn't think this would cause him to bite me in the face.

My cat has started to snore during his afternoon nap beside me on the sofa. It's cute.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Possibly the best profilactic ever

Does anyone else out there watch this John and Kate Plus 8 show? It is one of those shows that manages to fascinate and horrify me in equal doses each and every week.

It is a reality show on TLC about a couple who had trouble getting pregnant so they did IVF, and then they had twins. After the twins, they decided to try for one more baby, and succeded in getting pregnant with SIX babies. SIX HUMAN BABIES. That's a LITTER for crying out loud.

They are really cute kids - even when they are screaming and biting and beating on each other. I love to watch the general chaos that occurs each and every week. The mom is pretty much anal OCD woman, and I think that is the only reason the entire house doesn't get ripped apart by those children. And it blows my mind that the parents don't have perpetual migraines. I can see how it is not the life they would have necessarily planned for themselves, but they really are making the best of it.

Anyone who knows me in real life knows I am not a huge fan of kids - babies in particular freak me the fuck OUT. So I am thinking of making a video of the John and Kate Plus 8 show. And if ever I lose my mind and think, "maybe having just one kid could be fun..." I will put that tape in the machine, and will be able to get back to my regularly scheduled life.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

What did she think was going to happen????

Okay, so The Hills last night did not disappoint. Except for one thing.

1. Where the heck was Brody? Waaaaaah. I used to beg for more Whitney, but now I'm getting more Whitney and no Brody. Boo. However, my cousin in Alberta went to a radio promo at a club and Brody and Frankie were there. Not a word of a lie. I saw the photos, (thanks Facebook!) but haven't asked her if she got to make out with him or anything.

2. Even I'm getting tired of hearing myself say how much I hate Justin Bobby. He took Audrina on a date and kept burping in her face! And his motorcycle is absolutely ridiculous. I was so glad that her co-worker convinced her to blow him off. I hope this is a lasting trend.

3. Holy Crackamoly wtf was Heidi thinking? First she hijacks Lauren at an event by just walking up and being like "Hi." Like nothing ever even happened. (By the way, at that moment I totally loved how Whitney stepped up and broke the ice). Then that ends badly because she is in denial about Spencer. Then she cyberstalks Lauren and convinces her that they should meet to put everything behind them. But at the meeting, she totally refuses to take any accountability, continues to deny knowledge of any actions on Spencer's part (although at least now she is not denying that he actually did it), and just keeps saying the same thing over and over. If I were Lauren I wouldn't even have met with her at all considering how Heidi reacted when they saw each other at the event. I was a little disappointed in Lauren's obviously rehearsed line "I want to forgive you....and I want to forget you." (so dramatic, though, right?), but I was glad that she called Heidi out for not doing anything, and for being in denial about what a shady person Spencer is. In the end Heidi stormed out, but I don't see how she could have expected a different outcome without changing her views or accepting any more of the blame.

I'm not sure how many episodes are left, but I will be sad when this season is over :(

Monday, November 12, 2007

Almost halfway there!!!

So far NoBloPoMo has not kicked my ass. I think I have put in a pretty respectable effort so far, and I haven't missed one day. Yay me!

Today I am dying to post about my mother's newfound disdain for a certain video rental chain, but fear that if I did she may not speak to me until I turn 30. Or until I get married. Although at this rate, I think 30 will come first. But trust me, it's hilarious, and I am plotting ways to get a rise out of her for the next few months.

Today the big *new* giant Airbus 380 flew over the city. I saw it by accident as I was driving to the mountain to walk doggies. I thought "wow, that big giant plane sure is flying awfully low to be this far into the city" and then I parked and started climbing the mountain. Apparently it was a big deal (no pun intended) and there were tons of people at the top of the mountain trying to catch a glimpse. How nice for them. Not nice for me because the doggies generally enjoy running into people eating lunch on the mountain because maybe they might get some. They pester them and try to jump on them, and I have to wrangle them and it's aggrevating. And when there are 50 people eating lunch on the mountain, they think maybe they will all get some. And then things just get crazy with the whining and the pawing and the jumping. That's why as soon as I heard about all the people at the top we alternated our route to avoid the bulk of them. Airbus ruined our walk.

Apparently the Airbus is 7 stories high. To this I say meh.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Since Christmas is dead....

I'm definitely not dreaming of a white one.

It snowed in New Brunswick today, apparently. Or maybe last night. I can only say, wow, am I ever glad I don't live there anymore.

I am a big fan of the 2-10 degrees Celsius temperature range. I adore a brisk walk through the leaves with the pups. I dig a nice warm coffee/latte/hot chocolate when my nose is cold and my cheeks are rosy. I love wearing sweaters, scarves, mittens, and my Uggs. But I HATE snow. Snow should be relegated to mountains only (for the skiing and the snowboarding), but I would be elated if they built a big giant bubble over the city so we could avoid the following:

  • giant snowbanks that I have to try and plow my car into because they haven't bothered to clean the streets yet (sometimes they check the weather report and rather than getting out there and getting to it, they wait to see if it will melt away).
  • ice. Black ice. Giant ice puddles. Ice on stairs. All kinds of it. I can't even count the number of times I've bruised my ass while walking dogs and hitting a patch of ice. And it's the worst here because they don't seem to understand how to use salt on the sidewalks. So whole blocks will have a sheet of ice the whole length. Either you skate your way down the block, or you take it to the streets and risk getting mowed over by a car.
  • wet jeans. There is nothing worse than having to walk through a snowbank and getting your jeans wet, and then the wet works its way up to your knees. I have gaiters that I wear when it's too warm for snowpants, but it still happens.
So, I'm thankful it didn't snow here this weekend. But I'm bracing myself because I'm sure it's coming soon.

Also, a small addition to my holiday wish list - I forgot to include a DVR. I think that this would drastically improve my quality of life. As of right now, I am pretty much chained to my television most nights during primetime. This would free up this time for, you know, the drinking and the carousing.

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Reason number 377...

...that I should never have nor be around small children: I think they are real-live adult humans, when really they are not.

This summer friends of SB's moved into a house with a pool, so they had a pool party/bbq to cap off the nice weather. They have a little girl who is probably not quite two years old...I don't know, I suck at guessing ages.

Anyway, I was playing with their dog, as I do, and the little kid was standing near us. She had a Dora doll (even I know who Dora is) and the little monkey who is friends with Dora, who was wearing a T-shirt that said "Boots".

Me: What's that girl's name? (pointing at the Dora doll; I said this in french because the kid is french)
Her: That's Dora (holding up the Dora doll. Good start)
Me: And this one?
Her: That's Babouche.
Me: No, no, I think his name is Boots.
Her: No, Babouche.
Me: No, it's Boots (frustrated already) see, it says so on his shirt (point to his name, making no sudden movements because she's starting to look upset).
Her: No, Babouche.
Me: I really think his name is Boots (backing away because her little miniature brow is furrowed and I really don't want her to scream at me.)
Her: NO, BABOUCHE (shaking toy vehemently in one hand and pointing wildly with the other)
Me: Ya, sure, okay, whatever (backing up slowly, then running away)

Before we left I asked her mom why she calls the toy Babouche when his name is Boots (it says so on his shirt).

"Oh, on the French show it's Babouche."


Friday, November 09, 2007

Big Boss Lady

I am so angry that No Country for Old Men is coming out in the theatres and I still haven't had a chance to read the book yet! I was totally oblivious to Cormac McCarthy until I read The Road, which completely totally unequivocally blew me away, and No Country was next on my list but I just haven't had a chance to order books. (Plus I have a stack of unread books almost as tall as me and I think if I brought one more into the house SB may throw me out). I've been avoiding reviews and interviews with the stars all day for fear it will ruin something for me. I think I will go to Chapters tomorrow to purchase it.

I was supposed to clean my house today, but I didn't. I feel slightly guilty, but I was doing other things. So poo to vacuuming.

Tomorrow we are interviewing potential part-timers. We think we may possibly be at the point where it is a good idea to expand. So we are meeting a few people, and I have to say it feels good to be interviewing for a new spot instead of to replace someone - we don't have that pressure of "Okay it's suzie's last day in one week and we need to train someone stat" so it feels really nice to try be able to take our time to find the right person. It's all very exciting. Not as stressful as I thought. I'm really digging one of the applications we got, but I'm trying to keep an open mind so that everyone gets a fair shot. And we're holding interviews at SB's office so I get to have coffee from the fancy-pancy coffee machine. Awesome.

Thursday, November 08, 2007


Have you ever seen that commercial for Advil Cold and Sinus, where the woman is all sick and is talking like "if you think a cold is going to keep me from running a 100 mile marathon and baking a cake at the same time then you don't know me"?

Ya, well, I'm not her. Illness throws me to the ground and stomps on my face, then it sits on me and farts. But for the past three weeks of fighting my allergy/cold (still going, by the way, and all the meds are really dehydrating me, yet also leaving me with a running nose) I have been keeping up my running regime. This regime consists of me hauling my ass into the extra room and running on the treadmill 2-3 times per week. It's been going really well - I run about 2 miles each time, so about 20 minutes, and thanks to my little iPod I not only have great tunes, but also have the Nike+ system that lets me track my runs and my progress.

I think the Nike+ is probably one of the best inventions ever. You get a little pod that you put in your Nike+ shoe (if you don't have these shoes you can buy a little clip to attach it to your shoelaces), and it sends a signal to your iPod nano that tracks your distance, pace, time, and calories burned. Then there is a whole website where you upload your data, set goals, and you can compete in challenges etc. AND there is a 'map it' section where if you run outdoors (I'm not quite there yet, so maybe in the spring I'll do it) you can map your route and how far it is, and other people can run it too.

So, I highly recommend everyone gets one, and if you do, and you are a beginning runner, then let me know and we can challenge each other online.

****totally random side note: SB and I are watching Survivor right now, and every week while it's on Global TV they show a promo for Survivor (I know, stupid right, showing the promo for the show you're watching while you're watching it) where you hear Jeff Probst saying "Just how we like it here on Survivor - nice and wet."

This cracks SB up every single time he hears it. And for the next three days, he will randomly say it while we grocery shop, drive in the car, or walk down the street. And I will laugh.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Someone's gonna come crawlin' back

The Hills is quickly becoming demoted as my favorite MTV show ever by its new competition, A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. I know, I'm disgusted with myself that I love that show because it's so trashy. But I just can't look away. And that blonde lesbian Amanda cracks me up.

But I digress.

The Hills this week was pretty boring on the surface, but after thinking about it, there was a lot going on.

1. Lauren and Whitney were ultra-boring this week, mostly because they threw their party, and it went off with out a hitch. Boo. Well, good for them, but boo for us. The closest we got to disaster was Whitney taking her walkie-talkie earpiece out of her ear.

2. Justin Bobby is a big fat loser and Audrina is an idiot. Dude, just say "I am dating Audrina. We are dating." Because we are watching you on TV. And whether you want to admit it or not, you are dating. And then Audrina gets hit on by a totally presentable cute nice guy who is in a band, and she is all grossed out by him. Um, your boyfriend thinks he's Eddie Veddar and, sorry, but hello it's not the 90s anymore.

3. I think Heidi is starting to realize that her life sucks. I'm pretty sure she didn't picture spending her 21st birthday alone with Spencer eating dinner on the same side of the table (I HATE when people eat on the same side of the table). There was no party because she no longer has any friends, and the one person she does have in her life spent half of the meal playing with his Blackberry.

In the previews for next week Heidi and Lauren have a sit-down. Now that's TV that rivals 11 dudes and 11 lesbians fumbling around in a foam party.

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

It was like my birthday or something!

Last night I made ribs for dinner, which I haven't done in a very long time. Because they are messy and icky, I generally like to take the opportunity to be bad and serve french fries alongside, because then you can just eat the whole meal with your hands. So I asked SB to stop at our favorite Belgian French fry place to pick up some fries.

He ordered a large fry and the sauces we like, and the guy was like "I'll give you two small fries because small fries are free today".

Huh? Yay for us!

So, obviously if you want to get me a present, free fries are on the list, but with the holidays coming up, here is my gift wish list:

Items I WANT WANT WANT but am unlikely to receive (the same list I give SB for every single holiday/birthday, etc - notice "new iPod" is gone - he really came through on my birthday!):
- Nikon D40x camera.
- a vacation somewhere.
- a male Himalayan kitten

Items I would love to have that are within reach:
- an FM transmittor for my iPod - I haven't really researched them much so not sure which model I want but the last one I had that was stolen was awesome - it worked as a stand for the iPod too and plugged directly into the power source. I think it was a Belkin.
- gift card to FutureShop/BestBuy - in case there are 100 FM transmittors and choosing one is scary.
- Chapters gift cards, since there are about 187 books that I am dying to read
- Shopping gift cards (for Cadillac Fairview malls) or H&M gift cards. Because I have this syndrom lately where I refuse to buy myself clothes. And now all my clothes are old and gross and I am almost naked.
- hugs.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Extreme randomness

I just got halfway through a big long post about reasonable accomodation, then got disgusted even thinking about it and saved it as a draft. Not to say I won't come back to it (November is a long month!) but I guess I can only take so much at once. Maybe I won't post it at all.

I have been knitting myself a scarf. It's lilac and white, because I had a medium sized ball of each left, so, there you go. One side of it is slightly messed up, but it's for me, so I'm not being too picky about it. I love knitting. It helps me get rid of lots of nervous energy, which I've had a lot of lately. When I'm feeling anxious I pick and chew at the skin around my nails, which I know is gross and ugly, but that's what I do and I've done it since.....probably since I had teeth, and that's that. So knitting is a good way for me to be able to watch TV without gnawing off my pinky finger. Maybe I will knit myself some mittens that I can wear the rest of the time when I'm not knitting.

For some reason I feel very scatterbrained today and am having trouble concentrating on one thought. (Maybe it was the 4 cups of coffee at breakfast....) So here's this and have a great night.

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Not those kinds of night sweats

Guess where I was when the time changed????

I was lying on the floor of my bathroom trying to get every inch of my bare skin to touch the cool cool tile while I sweated out....something. If I had been in my right mind I might have removed my sweatpants, but at least I got the legs pulled up. And I was also too busy putting the bathroom trash into a garbage bag and then removing the plastic bucket part of the garbage so that I could go lay down on the sofa next to an open window and still have something to puke in, while trying to remain prostrate on the cool cool tile.

I'm still not sure what the hell was going on. I woke up cramping and puky, and ran to the bathroom wherein the sweating began. After about 30 minutes in there I thought it was safe to retreat to the sofa, where there was NO television worth watching on any of our 400 channels so I finished the book I was reading and drank water. I finally went back to bed around 4/3 o'clock and had nightmares and tossed and turned, but did not throw up.

Then this morning I felt all better.

I am blaming the whole thing on some frozen appetizers we ate yesterday (fully cooked, of course) even though SB didn't get sick at all. Because it's either those or steak, and if it's steak, I might kill myself.

Saturday, November 03, 2007

No, I didn't forget

I just had a busy week. I actually did watch The Hills on Tuesday, but was a bit distracted with work and illness and friends needing support, and I didn't really pay much attention to it.

I got to watch the re-run today, so here are my thoughts:

1. I feel bad for poor goofy Whitney. She seems like she should be good at her job, but she always comes off as not really put together. At all. Maybe she was just nervous, but I found her to be kinda unprepared during the meeting with the New York team. But, all worked out well and Lisa Love was happy.

2. Lauren and Brody need to just get back together already. I know that a lot of what happens on the show is staged (sorry to break it to you, if you weren't aware...) and I have a feeling that they are actually together, but just stringing along the reveal until like season finale time or something. This both makes me annoyed and happy - annoyed because I want it to just happen already, but happy because I'm sure things would be a lot less interesting if they were actually together.

3. It seems that Spencer is actually starting to see what an effing dumbass he is, and is trying to make amends with Brody. This probably has less to do with Lauren and The Hills than it has to do with the fact that Spencer probably isn't getting much play at clubs and stuff now that he is not part of Brody's entourage. Because who wants Spencer around just for the sake of having Spencer around?

Friday, November 02, 2007

In Case you didn't notice....

I'm doing it. Kill me now.

This is me on drugs

I finally broke down and took the NyQuil last night. NyQuil and I have a sordid past, which includes a slight dependency on my part. I have been trying to stay away from it, and have been quite successful ever since our move, but this cold/allergy is kicking my bum, so I broke out the tiny plastic graded cup and took my dose like a man.

Now I feel FABULOUS - no boogies, no coughing, although I do feel like I could probably sleep away all of Friday if I had the chance.

But, alas, I do not have the chance. I have to do groceries. Probably my least favorite thing to do on the weekend, besides visiting IKEA, so I will try to get it done today instead. Even though I really hate lugging all the grocery bags up the stairs by myself. I'm thinking of constructing some kind of modern dumbwaiter system. That would also come in handy if ever Gabby's medications stop working.

And how about we just add to the randomness by saying that I am so excited for The Amazing Race to start this weekend. I am so jealous of the citizens of the US for having the opportunity to participate in this show. Here I am stuck in Quebec, land of stupid contest rules, so even if the Amazing Race Canada ever did happen, I probably wouldn't be eligible.

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Feeling very Eeyore

My cold/allergy is back. I thought it was a cold because my throat got all sore and yucky, but now because of its persistance I'm starting to think it's allergies. I am stopping for drugs on my way home today. Then maybe I will go to the pharmacy for some Claritin.

So, November is here, which means Christmas is right next door. We all know Christmas is dead, so I have nothing to look forward to until Valentine's Day. Actually, I am quite looking forward to this weekend because of the time change. I think this is now my favorite weekend of the year. How sad is my life when the thing I look forward to the most in 365 days is a chance to sleep for an extra hour. Wow.