Friday, August 20, 2010

14 weeks and 4 days

One of the major issues I'm having with being pregnant is getting fat again. Rationally, I know that this is what happens when you are growing a human in you, but psychologically I'm finding it very, very difficult.

Two years ago I started the process of shedding excess weight that I was unhappy with. I was very successful, and very happy with the results, ultimately losing over 30 pounds. I was more active, had more energy, and actually enjoyed shopping again.

Now I find myself only 15 pounds away from where I started.

Yes, it's true that after the wedding I put on about 5-7 lbs from my lowest point, but I think this is normal, and it brought me to a point where I didn't have to constantly worry about what I was eating to maintain the weight I was at.

At the beginning of the pregnancy I stopped eating/drinking things with aspertame and started drinking more milk and juice - this small thing added on another 5-7 pounds within a month or so, but I felt I didn't want to chance the chemical effects on the baby (even though they say they are relatively safe).

I also had to quit running, not because running is bad for you to do in a normal pregnancy, but because we had a horrible heat wave and I barely wanted to chance walking the dog let alone running 5Km since they say overheating is very dangerous for a pregnant lady. By the time heat let up, I felt like my body wasn't ready to start back up again without it being dangerous.

Then, I started to get HUNGRY. All the time. And I was so worried that I would suddenly be stricken by morning sickness and not be able to keep anything down, that I figured "better get while the getting is good" so I ate. Whatever I felt like it, whenever it struck me.

But morning sickness never came and by 12 weeks I was already within 15 lbs of my starting fat weight.

But, by week 10 I also realized that I probably wouldn't be getting morning sickness after all and reined in my "feeding" habits and I'm holding steady at the same weight in the meantime.

Hopefully it will all balance in the end, but for now I feel fat, gross, and fat. And no matter how many times I tell myself that it's not fat, it's baby, and no matter how many times SB tells me "But that's where the baby goes!" when I look disgustedly at my gut, I think I won't feel comfortable until the "real" baby bump appears.


Jenn said...

I am totally disturbed by all of these events!

Well, first off.. Not that there is any point saying it cuz lord know I'm no health expert.. But give yourself a break for 6 months... As you will seen be carrying around a little person on your hip for like, EVER. Seriously, you should have seen Sarah's biceps after she had her son. They were freakish.

But I'm more disturbed that you're pregnant! Wait.. Disturbed isn't the right word.. Shocked? I hope you update regularly on this. I feel like we have similar views on babies and what not, so I'm endlessly interested on how you'll experience this. :)

In all seriousness, though - congratulations, and I am thrilled for you. You are going to be the coolest mom ever. :)

Can I touch your stomach?

knitnat said...


Love you preggo posts. I know I can trust you to tell it like is, very refreshing.

I'm not sure if this goes for all pregnant ladies but my friend and co-worker had a baby and is now 10-15 lbs less than her pregnancy weight 6 months after having the baby. I think that breastfeeding and sleep depravation following birth will take a lot of energy and loosing the weight gained during pregnancy will not be as difficult to lose.


Jules said...

Thanks ladies. I do plan to update pretty often, hopefully once a week. And Jenn, if you come near my belly I will not hesitate to punch you in the nose.

I'm feeling a little better about the weight gain, but am holding tight to the whole "breast milk use makes the pounds go down" premise. Here's hoping, I guess.