I Just Wanna Look Like a Princess

Okay, so a real post after my two day craze to change my format.

Tomorrow my formal offer should arrive by mail. I will wait patiently, and then will accost the mailman as he comes up the stairs. If it is not here tomorrow, I will be very sad. I don't have a whole lot else to look forward to during my time off.

Also, hopefully tomorrow, my iPod will be coming back home. I had to send it in for service, and they picked it up on Thursday evening. I got an email Saturday saying they were sending it back, repaired. I hope it gets back tomorrow. I hope it's fixed. Actually, no I don't hope it's fixed, I hope that they sent me a new or refurbished one cause mine had a slight scratch in the very middle of the screen which was very annoying. And I hope that the *new one* (wish, hope) doesn't have the same problem. I'll be very upset if it does.

We went to the Let's Get Married show on Sunday - it's like a home show, but all wedding stuff. Sexy Boyfriend actually went with me, which was nice, because a) it's him I'm marrying, so I like that he's getting involved, and b) he carried all the heavy magazines and stuff that they give out. After the show, I had a minor mental break.

I'm stressed about having a wedding. I want nothing more in life than to have that "Perfect Day", and I have a picture in my head about what I want and it's all lovely and wonderful. But then I think about all the things that could give me headaches, and will give me headaches, and are giving me headaches, and I think I want to run away to Vegas.

1)The Dress - I have one opportunity in my life to look like a princess. I don't want to be a plump princess, or, god forbid, a fat princess, I want to be the me I was when I started dating Sexy Boyfriend. I was not tiny by any stretch, but I looked good. Better. So sad. I have resolved to lose at least 20 pounds before even thinking of trying on dresses. Otherwise I'm scared I will get discouraged and I actually will run away to Vegas so I can get married in whatever I want cause no one will see.

2)Family travel - All of my friends either live in Montreal, or will travel from points other than NB to get here. About half of the family I will invite are in NB, and all the rest are scattered throughout points outside of Montreal. I'm pretty sure all of his family that he will invite are in NB. They will complain about getting here. They will complain about paying for lodging. They will complain about where said lodging is. They will want to be entertained while they're here (aside from the wedding). And I will be stressed. So stressed, I will run away to Vegas, maybe to live there.

3) Money - we have none. Well, we have some, but we are also trying to save for a house. Sexy Boyfriend threw out a number on how much he would like to spend per person, and I almost started to cry because not one of the places I've inquired to (big range of places) was even close. And I don't want to compromise. It's important to me that things are how I want them. And I'm okay with waiting a little longer. But I am already feeling a lot of pressure to get this thing going.

So, we medicated the breakdown with Ben and Jerry's, and I'm putting the wedding magazines away for a while.